Author: Laura Crowley

Campus-Wide Epidemic Imminent

The warning signs have been building for some time now: dried vomit on sidewalks, beer-can-littered streets and stray beer-pong balls rattling around campus. Yet we ignored them. We wouldn’t admit what was happening, no matter how obvious it became. We swept it all under the carpet of school pride and now who has an epidemic on their hands? We Do.

Word from Student Health Services is that the abandoned shoes that can be found lying around campus and Lewisburg’s student district on Friday and Saturday nights are the latest in a progression of signs indicating an outbreak of the Otis Campbell Plague (OCP) at the University.

Named for the pitiful, disheveled town drunk on “The Andy Griffith Show,” OCP is rampant on campuses throughout the United States.

“We’ve been projecting the progression of OCP, using SUNY Albany as a model,” explained Dr. Avery Parnell of Student Health Services. “Bucknell appears to be in dire straights. SUNY Albany is the textbook case study of OCP, and there, the students have descended into anarchy. The footage researchers have brought back is disturbing. One particularly haunting image was a student wearing a kilt and standing on a car while playing bagpipes.”

In short, the University is facing an epidemic of sadly cartoonish drunkenness.

“The appearance of abandoned shoes on campus and downtown tells us that not only is a percentage of the University student body infected, but that some individuals have progressed to a critical stage,” said Dr. Parnell, who would not comment as to what percentage of the student body is infected. “These students must be located and quarantined before they spread the illness further.”

To facilitate such quarantine, the Department of Public Safety has enacted its “Cinderella Protocol.” On Sundays, students will be required to report to the Public Safety office and try on the shoes that were found that weekend. If a shoe fits a student, that student will be reassigned to housing in Larison Hall, which has become the University’s designated quarantine zone.

“The Cinderella Protocol is vital to the survival of the University’s good name,” Public Safety Officer Patrick O’Brian said. “Things are going downhill. It begins with missing shoes and ends with students staggering around campus singing ‘How Dry I Am.’”

The World Health Organization (WHO) states that OCP is prevalent among first-year students but also occurs in students suffering from “senioritis.” WHO’s website provides the following list of symptoms:

• Use of the phrase “I feel like” rather than “I think” (It is believed that OCP inhibits students’ ability to form definitive opinions.)
• Overuse of the word “bro”
• Overuse of “cray cray”
• Overuse of hashtags on social networking sites
• In males, a penchant for khakis
• In females, a penchant for North Face jackets
• A craving for Bison Dogs
• Missing shoes
• In the final stages, waking up on a couch many miles from one’s campus with no recollection of how one got there

Students are urged to contact Health Services immediately when these symptoms are noticed on or near campus. In the meantime, Health Services, Geisinger Medical Center, Evangelical Community Hospital, Public Safety and the Buffalo Valley Regional Police Department are coordinating to brace for a full-on outbreak of the epidemic.

Arianna Huffington Hosts Q&A Session with Students

By Anna Jones

Though many students and guests had the privilege of hearing Arianna Huffington’s speech for the University’s “tech/no” series on Feb. 19, only about 25 students had the chance to get up close and personal with the media powerhouse. When Huffington arrived on campus, she went straight to the Elaine Langone Center to host a question and answer session with students.

Huffington started off the session by joking about the several inches of snow we’d just accumulated. After a few minutes of small talk, she jumped right into the session. The first question was about polling and how Huffington’s views have shifted over time. She answered with an interesting statement about how polling techniques have weakened journalism.

“It’s much easier for a journalist to just stay at their desk and collect the latest polling results instead of doing real research,” Huffington said.

“The response rates [of polls] are plummeting … most people don’t want to spend 20 minutes in the middle of dinner talking to a stranger,” Huffington said. “I would place polls in the same place as horoscopes … have fun and read polls like you have fun and read your horoscope. Few people plan their day based on their horoscopes though.”

Once the ball got rolling with the first question, the Q&A took off. Many students had questions on topics ranging from international media to journalism to career advice.

After a question from Kathleen Lenox ’13 on the Huffington Post in different countries, Huffington began to explain how the Post is run internationally.

“We are now in six countries … [and aside from the UK and Canada] we launched with a media partner … as a joint venture,” Huffington said. “We wanted every edition to be very grounded in the culture of the country … so we hired journalists from that country.”

Next, she fielded questions about technology, emphasizing that technology increases access.

“It can give a voice to people who didn’t have a voice before,” Huffington said. “But there’s something different about being live or in print.”

She continued to explain how easy it is to get caught up in technology and only stare at your computer screen.

Huffington went on to talk about the importance of blogging. Blogging has created a tremendous opportunity for anyone who can produce quality writing. Huffington even told one story about a homeless girl who began blogging and was eventually noticed by Harvard. The university offered her a place all thanks to blogging for the Huffington Post, and she is now a successful young woman.

She wrapped up the talk with a bit of advice when a student asked about how to enter the business of journalism.

“It’s all about doing what you love and working your way up,” Huffington said.

If you missed the speech, check it out online at: http://storify.com/BucknellU/arianna-bucknell

New Courses in the Works

By Ethan Weber

The latest sounds coming from the Sigfried Weis Music Building are neither opera recordings nor the plucked strings of harpsichords, but rather rumors and chatter of a new course to be offered to University students. The course? MUSC 147: “Introduction to Caf Music.”

“For quite some time now, we in the Music Department have been becoming increasingly aware of a disturbing trend among Bucknellians,” Dr. Irving Carmichael said. “The majority of non-music majors possess little knowledge of music history prior to the 1990s.”

“They’re incredibly egocentric,” Prof. Stevland Manilow said. “If it’s from before they were born, it’s as if it was never written or received airtime. This became all too clear at last year’s Chrysalis when it was learned that a large percentage of University students didn’t know who The Village People, the featured act, were.”

“It was really embarrassing,” Carmichael said. “The one that dresses like a construction worker even had to correct the students on how to do ‘Y.M.C.A.’ It’s like these kids have never been to a wedding reception or anything.”

After surveying University students about their knowledge of 20th-century popular music,  Carmichael and Manilow observed that Bucknellians do seem to be familiar with some of the older songs played over the radio in Bostwick Dining Hall.

“They like Bon Jovi’s ‘Livin’ on a Prayer,’ The Commodores’ ‘Brick House’ and most things by Michael Jackson. Some of them even admit to not hating KC and the Sunshine Band’s ‘I’m Your Boogie Man,’ which plays in there several times a week,” Carmichael said. “Still, most of them didn’t know who many of these acts were.”

“We hope that by opening an intellectual dialogue about these songs, we can lessen students’ need for auto-tuning and dubstep,” Manilow said.

Even though this course is still only in the planning stages, it has already prompted a parallel movement within the English Department. There, professors are designing similar courses, ENGL 236: “Films and Television Shows That Premiered Before You Were Born but Are Nonetheless Iconic and You Should Really Be Familiar with Them,” and ENGL 240: “Paper and the Printed Word: Where Are They Now?”

Both departments hope to offer these courses by next semester.

Trend Report: How to Look Good at the Gym (Without Really Trying!)

By Kate Jansen

Scenario: You decide to finally start your New Year’s resolution and go to the gym. Among the many decisions you must make while at the gym (Which machine should I use? Should I run upstairs to avoid seeing people I know?), you’re also faced with the issue of what to wear. You’re sporting your too-short Solows from sixth grade, your senior class t-shirt and dirty Keds.

We’ve all been there, which is why I’ve compiled a list of chic gym attire from the bottom up.

Bright sneakers: One of this spring’s hottest looks is the neon athletic sneaker. These shoes are fantastic for any sort of outdoor adventure and are a great excuse for pretending to go to the gym. I was in desperate need of new running shoes, so I recently ordered a pair of multi-colored Asics on Zappos. I have fallen head over heels in love. I wear them as often as I can, even if I don’t make it to the gym.

Leggings: I would say that leggings are a staple in the closets of many University women. To avoid the biting winter wind, wear a pair of leggings when you’re jogging to the gym. Although LuLu Lemon seems to be the go-to store for buying leggings, I have also bought great pairs from Gap Body and Athleta for half the price!

Tanks: Don’t be afraid to show off some skin this winter! Leggings look great paired with a sport tank top. Check out the Barnes & Noble Bookstore for some super-cute and spirited Under Armour tank tops.

Zip-ups and pull-overs: When I do make it to the gym, I always layer a pull-over or zip-up over my tank top. Patagonia and The North Face offer a variety of high-quality fleeces and quarter-zips.

Director David O. Russell’s latest film “Silver Linings Playbook” (based on Matthew Quick’s novel of the same name) walks a fine line between psychological drama and romantic comedy but does so with such exuberance that if you blink you’ll forget to question the unusual juxtaposition.

Pat Solitano, Jr. (Bradley Cooper) has just been released from the Pennsylvania State Mental Hospital after eight court-ordered months on the understanding that he will live with his parents and continue taking his medications. The reason he was locked up to begin with? He recently beat his wife’s lover nearly to death, and she has since divorced and filed a restraining order against him. Pat’s new plan upon getting back home: win her back.

His return to his working class Philly suburb is not that simple. His parents, though enthusiastic for his recuperation, are unsure of how to treat Pat’s violent mood swings and unrealistic expectations. His father, Pat Sr., (Robert De Niro) is a dedicated Eagles fan who has been issued a lifetime ban for fighting at games. Since then, he has been working as a bookie from home, an arrangement which has gotten him into some financial straits which play out later on. His wife (Jacki Weaver) tries to juggle the superstitions and unexpected similarities of the two men but is met with mixed success.

Change comes in the form of Pat Jr.’s unexpected friendship with a fellow social misfit, Tiffany (Jennifer Lawrence), a young widow living nearby in her parents renovated garage. Tiffany is something of a Hollywood stock character: a blunt, practical, female lead who forces our hero to come to terms with reality. Lawrence manages to breathe some life into Tiffany’s familiar personality which definitely helps to quiet automatic associations with other similar characters (Amy Adams’ bartending college dropout comes quickly to mind). One of the absolute best scenes in the film includes Pat and Tiffany exchanging thoughts on antidepressants and other behavioral medications to the evident discomfort of their tablemates at a dinner party.

Eventually, the general search for silver linings comes to a head with a massive gamble involving an Eagles game and a dance competition that Pat and Tiffany plan to compete in. And though the deus ex machina is cranking pretty loudly at this point, it’s hard to deny the quirky heart at the film’s center.

“Silver Linings Playbook” has been extremely well-received by critics and fans alike for its tragicomic approach to love and stability.

“[It was] an emotionally engaging film about mental illness and recovery that works to show the public the intimacy and struggles associated with psychological disorders. It was raw, honest, touching and cringe-worthy at moments,” Kate Wilsterman ’14 said.

Clearly the Academy was similarly impressed, as the film has been nominated in eight categories, including Best Picture, Director, Actor, Actress, Supporting Actor and Supporting Actress. As De Niro’s character says in the film, “When life reaches out with a moment like this, it’s a sin if you don’t reach back.”

“Silver Linings Playbook” is this year’s feel-good movie and a real contender at this weekend’s Oscars.

 By Laura Razzuri

When I made the decision to study abroad for a full year, the first person I called was my mother.

“Finally!” my mother said. She had been begging me to consider a full year abroad and had been waiting for me to come to my senses and just do it. My mother knew from experience how beneficial a year abroad would be for language study. She had studied Spanish in Ecuador and I was going to study Arabic in Jordan. Most people would call me insane to spend a whole year in the very center of the Middle East right as the Arab Spring is still raging through the region. But as an interdepartmental Middle Eastern Studies major, nothing could be more exciting. I have been incredibly fortunate to have the guidance from Assistant Professor of Arabic Martin Isleem to navigate the Arab language and culture as well as Associate Professor of Political Science Tony Massoud for his support in creating a focused major on the Middle East.

It is an amazing thing to actually see and live through the things I have studied in my classes at the University. I’ve gained so much insight and perspective just by walking the streets of Amman and talking with Jordanians. When I first arrived, I quickly noted the cultural differences between Jordan and the United States. But as I finally settled in, I actually began to note the similarities and how much we are alike as people. I realized how similar the relationships between friends and family and everyday life in Jordan and America are. It is a beautiful thing to connect with people from completely different walks of life.

My first semester, I was studying Arabic everyday along with material-heavy courses on diplomacy and policy studies, but I learned most outside of the classroom. I will never forget the day when the King of Jordan announced the removal of important oil subsidies. It nearly doubled the cost of heating a household and refueling a car. Riots and protests sprung up throughout the entire country. This was the Arab Spring happening right before my eyes. I was actually witnessing history in the making.

One of the most remarkable experiences I have had so far was visiting the Za’atari Syrian Refugee Camp, one of the largest Syrian refugee camps along the northern border of Jordan. As we drove up, all I could see were rows and rows of white tents, and the camp was still expanding every day. I had the opportunity to visit families and talk with them about their experiences and the situation in Syria. Even in their current conditions, these families were inviting me into their tents offering me tea and cookies. The famous Arab hospitality still endured even through the worst of hardships. I will never forget how kind they were. Regardless of how tired and saddened they were, they were eager to share their experiences with us. They were so happy to meet students like myself, who were taking the time to learn their language and culture. To them, it was a sign of respect, a sign that maybe the relationship between the East and the West might change for the better. To them, it showed that people cared and that hopefully the conflict would end sooner than later. It was a powerful and yet humbling experience that I will never forget.

For my last few months in Jordan I am living with a family. They are amazing and are always feeding me. I am learning so much more about Arab culture and household dynamics. I know it’s going to be tough to say good-bye to them and to Jordan. Amman truly feels as if it has become my second home. I navigate the city like a Jordanian and can haggle successfully in the markets and cabs. There have even been occasions where I have been mistaken for a Jordanian because of my dark hair, features and confident Arabic. This year-long experience has made me fall in love with Jordan, with Arabic and with Arab culture. If there is one thing I know for sure, it’s that I will be back.

Laura Crowley

Dr. Thompson: Mass incarceration as the problem, not solution

Many Americans would instinctively agree that locking away criminals would make our nation more secure. On Feb. 13, Dr. Heather Ann Thompson of Temple University said otherwise. The number of imprisoned Americans has skyrocketed in recent years to numbers that are unparalleled internationally. There are even more people behind bars today than there were slaves in 1850. What Thompson and other acclaimed political scientists have found is that mass incarceration is desolating our cities, orphaning our children, threatening our democracy, depleting our communities’ resources and weakening our economy. This trend doesn’t just affect the incarcerated, Thompson said, but its systemic effects are changing all of our lives.

One trend Thompson mentioned is the “white flight” that occurred when whites left the cities in exchange for the suburbs in the 1980s. After this mass exodus, a so-called “criminalization of urban space” occurred when the federal government targeted cities in its crackdown on crime. During that time, record populations, which were overwhelmingly African-American males, were given heavy sentences and cities cleared out. The trend of mass imprisonment continues today and in 2012, a record 2,266,800 Americans were behind bars. But the record number of incarcerated cannot be attributed to increased crime rates, as the two variables have been proven to be disaggregated from each other. Some may see mass incarceration as a modern day form of racial oppression, since one in nine black men will be imprisoned within his lifetime.

What is perhaps more disturbing is that one in 28 children are now orphaned due to mass incarceration and the associated loss of parental rights. Along those lines, the imposition of police in schools has even led to the incarceration of children, often with behavioral issues. Thompson mentioned a case in which police interrogated a child for 10 hours. With the increasing pattern of imprisonment in kids ages 10-17, Thompson contends that America’s youth is being deprived of a normal childhood.

In some cities, with so many Americans behind bars, one in every 16 residents has cleared out. Most behind bars are black, causing the demographic to become disfranchised politically, since so many of many of them have been stripped of their voting rights due to their status as a felon. If this disfranchised population had been afforded its rights, studies show that the outcomes of several elections would have been changed.

The incarcerated are also making our cities poorer, Thompson said. Every one person counted in the census is, on average, allotted $10,000. Since the incarcerated are not counted in the census, communities are being deprived of financial resources, especially those in cities.

With the privatization of prisons, our financial well-being as a country has also been put in jeopardy. Private companies such as Victoria’s Secret, Dell and Starbucks are now opting to hire the imprisoned versus free citizens, since prisoners are model employees as they don’t need vacation time, don’t complain and don’t stay home from work. But this doesn’t mean prisoners are getting rich, Thompson said; prisoners in private prisons are required to pay for their housing, food and other expenses and rarely break even, which means they are typically broke when freed.

Sixty-five million Americans have a criminal record, which means they are faced with enormous challenges in finding work. Furthermore, the newly freed are restricted from access to welfare, which means that freed convicts are not only unemployed, but are deprived of programs like food stamps.

Thompson contends that the money taxpayers spend toward up keeping Americans behind bars is exactly the money that needs to be spent on struggling communities.  Studies have shown that in times when money has been focused on the education systems and infrastructure in cities, crime rates have fallen. When sentences have been reduced from 30 to 15 years, studies have shown that the freed convict is more likely to become a functioning member of society.

Thompson and other political scientists have called this phenomenon “the elephant in the room” and have cited politics as the main obstacle to changing the epidemic. For instance, the Obama administration has carefully danced around the issue, since the notion of freeing the incarcerated doesn’t rest well with most Americans. What needs to occur, Thompson said, is a reevaluation of our prison system and consideration for modeling a new system on foreign ones that have proven themselves more effective.