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Arts & Life

Body Against Body

By Courtney Bottazzi

Staff Writer

On Feb. 11, the Bill T. Jones/Arnie Zane Dance Company performed “Body Against Body” as part of the Weis Center Performance Series. The performance challenged the audience to reconsider preconceived notions of what to expect from a visual performance. 

The pieces were all co-choreographed by Bill T. Jones and his late partner Arnie Zane. The first piece, “Duet x 2,” did not allow the audience the comfort of an audio track. Instead, the audience heard staccato sound bits from the dancers landing or the languid sweep of their feet across the floor. The dancers’ breathing was the most prominent sound throughout the piece. Without a beat to rely on, the audience was susceptible to the incredible task these dancers had of keeping up with one another.

“They [Jones and Zane] made works that were collaborative, matter-of-fact, inclusive, often disjointed, sometimes boring and sometimes fun,” said Marcia B. Siegel, a dance critic and lecturer. 

A union between two dancers’ bodies became evident. There were struggles, synchronization and at times moments of complete stillness where the dancers rested on each other in a hug.

The goal of the performance was clear: the audience was to participate by witnessing the experimentation of this dance rather than to sit back and be entertained. The unexpected aspects, such as surprising moments of humor and conversational speech, may have been for the audience’s benefit, but it was recreating the tension between two bodies that was the true intention of the performance.

The simple set design allowed for an intimate performance where the audience could pay more attention to different factors, such as focusing on one dancer or another, or noting which moves were being replicated.

“My overall impression of the performance was that it demonstrated the sheer athleticism of dance. Aesthetically, it wasn’t my favorite type of dance. I am typically intrigued by group dances that have some tangible element or storyline. So this type of dance was a departure from what I usually seek out. I was completely impressed by the creative process that went into building these pieces. The duets required a collaborative spirit, and I was amazed at their ability to stay on pace with each other without musical accompaniment,” Bucknell Dance Company member Adrienne Vischio ’12 said.

Kourtney Ginn ’12, also a senior member of the Bucknell Dance Company, was able to view the performance contextually with knowledge of Jones’ more recent pieces.

“I tried to look at the performance through a historical lens. I have seen Bill T. Jones’ more current work, but it was much different to see some of his original works this time. You can absolutely see his growth as a choreographer and how today he has been able to bridge the gap between post-modern dance (like what was presented) and the entertainment factor that many audiences desire now. As a choreographer myself, I could clearly see how he was exploring the fundamental elements dance composition through his use of repetition, space and others. Overall, the physicality and athleticism of this company never ceases to amaze me,” she said. 

It is clear that this dance company continuously strives to make an impact on its audience.

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Arts & Life

Q and A with student performers: The Wingmen

By Heather Hennigan

Contributing Writer

The Wingmen, a student band on campus, was featured last Friday night in Seventh Street Café’s Late Night series. The band members include Drew Picketts ’14 (lead vocals, rhythm guitarist, harmonica and kazoo), Alex Ororbia ’13 (lead guitarist, rhythm/funk guitarist, back-up vocals and band manager), Michael Mattei ’13 (bass, back-up vocals, rhythm guitarist, flute and manager), Andy Hritz ’14 (keyboard, saxophone, kazoo and percussion) and Tony Veloz ’14 (violin). 


Q: What type of music do you play/write? What are some of your influences?

A: Drew: “We play reggae, ’90s rock, blues and some originals. Everyone in the band comes from different musical backgrounds and listens to their own distinct genres.”
A: Michael: “In terms of the music we play, I don’t really like to classify us. Each member of the band likes to listen to and play completely different genres, and we just do our best to work with each other and add our own flavor. I’d say the biggest influence in our sound, though, is Drew’s love of reggae and ska, and also some punk influence. That’s definitely the bare bones of what we do.”

A: Alex: “Whenever I write riffs or song ideas for the band, I usually come from a funk perspective and draw from 90s rock composition and old classic rock riff ideas, and then mix in key change ideas to spice up the feel of the riffs and progressions. I like to write (i.e. brighten up a tune, create a sad bridge, etc.). The ideas (for a chorus, verse or both) that I bring to the band ultimately change to how the band functions as a whole and the resulting songs display a blend of those basic riffs, Drew’s melodies and lyrics, and Mike’s bass-lines. Andy has certainly brought in a different feel and style to the music we play. Not only is he good at creating the keyboard accompaniment (and bass-lines in certain cases) that we need for most songs, he brings in some progressive and classically influenced ideas into our writing. As a result, we have some pretty cool songs in the works. I would also say that Tony’s violin playing has added yet another dimension to our band’s style, putting in more interesting timbre in our music as well as some orchestral-sounding themes over top our progressions, influenced by his classical background and a love of improvisation. He’s told me the band is providing him with an excellent opportunity to improvise and experiment with violin playing in a unique way (especially trying to integrate it into our more funky rock style).”

Q: When did your band first form and how?

A: Alex: “Well, as I think back, Mike and I have been friends since our freshman year here at Bucknell. I remember him and I talking about how cool it would be to perform all of our favorite songs just even as guitar-bassist duo as early as freshman year.  Then I actually started a smaller performance group with a some music-loving friends who were interested in playing at Seventh Street, including a pianist and a guitarist, and we got a holiday party gig at Uptown where we needed to put together a set list within a few weeks. I met Drew at one at a meeting of the music club Mike tried starting up the 2010 fall semester, and he got a hold of me after I posted that we needed a singer on that club’s Facebook. I gave Mike a call one night and asked him if he was interested in joining in on a starting band with Drew and I (the other guys eventually couldn’t do it) and getting ready to play for a gig in just under a week. He accepted, and well, several days later we were playing at Uptown several holiday tunes that we modified like ‘Rosty the Snowman’ and ‘Jingle Blues’ and our own version of ‘Feliz Navidad’.”

Q: How did you come up with your band name?

A: Michael: “The name came from one of those instances where you’re just thinking about the day, and a particular phrase seems to describe it perfectly. I was walking back to my mod from practice (the first or second one, I don’t remember exactly) and I was thinking about how the band was going to work out and the role that each member would play (this was before Andy joined the band). It was obvious from the start that Drew would be the frontman, since he’s lead vocals. And Alex, he was sort of like the band’s wingman. He met me early in our freshman year. Then he met Drew later in our sophomore year (Drew was a freshman) and was like, ‘Hey, you two should get together and play some music!’ so Alex brought us all together and was, in my mind, dubbed the band’s wingman. A few seconds later, he received a text message that said ‘The Wingmen?’ and the rest is history.”

Q: Were you excited to be featured in Seventh Street Café’s Late Night series? How was it?

A: Alex: “Yes, I was excited to be a part of the Seventh Street Late Night series. I enjoy practicing for upcoming performances and crafting our set-lists for each gig as well as figuring out which original songs are performance-ready. I enjoy the laid-back environment of Seventh Street Café. Overall, it was very fun playing [there] and I hope the band gets to do more.”

A: Andy: “Oh yeah. Nothing beats being squeezed into the back corner. I can only escape by crawling under my keyboard … But in all seriousness, I like the opportunity to perform in front of peers without the pressures of having to sound professional or anything. We can jam and have a good time.”

Q: Do you ever get nervous?

A: Michael: “Generally, we’ve become really comfortable with [performing]. We just go in and have fun. We don’t care about our audience taking us seriously. We just want them to have fun with us and enjoy the show. We just wing it (pun intended) and play through mistakes and have good time.”

A: Alex: “I don’t usually get nervous for performances, given we have done them enough to know what to expect. We often joke that we certainly fit our band’s name since we often end up ‘winging some things and go into a performance after only having rehearsed some songs in our set only once or twice. But I love to improvise my guitar solos, so I feel it generally works out going in to some gigs with only a basic feel for certain songs. It can sometimes allow us to make a song we choose to perform more like a good cover, or our own version of it, rather than simply trying to copy it.”

Q: Any plans/hopes for the future?

A: Michael: “I have two hopes for the band. The first is that we work closely with other bands to enhance the musical community here at Bucknell. My other hope is that we can record as many of our songs as possible before Alex and I graduate so we can listen to them years from now and think back to the times we’ve had, but also so that friends and family from home can finally hear the band.”

A: Andy: “I know we’re trying to minimize our use of covers and shift to performing mostly original material. I’d like to write more for the band. I know all of us are trying to get an album out within a year.”

A: Alex: “I always hope for more gigs at Uptown or Seventh Street, and we would like to play a little bit more at some of the local venues of Lewisburg, like Bull Run Inn, Zelda’s Cafe, Cherry Alley, an event in Hufnagle park, etc.  Ultimately, we hope to phase out most of our cover songs with originals (we have plenty of works-in-progress at the moment) and just cycle in several of these covers for every show. One long-term band goal is to release an album of our original music and a few of our better covers within the year. We also have a Facebook page. Please visit our page and give us a ‘like’ to keep up on performance dates and sample songs we plan on posting there.”

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Arts & Life From the Mind of Wiley Jack Humor

From the mind of Wiley Jack: My Life as an Athlete

By Jack Wiles

Columnist

The last two weeks of writing this column I have exaggerated things in an attempt to induce laughter from your gullible little bodies. This week, shit gets real. From this pathetic and embarrassing story, I hope that you readers leave feeling sorry for me and go do something to change your lives for the better. It’s motivation time, son.

I was never a great athlete–-I’ll be the first to admit it–-but I could be decent at times and I played some sports in high school. Basketball was one that I dabbled in. When a group of my friends made a B-League intramural basketball team, I hopped on board very quickly. It’ll be fun! Some good exercise with my friends! Hoo-rah! Wiles, you sir, are incorrect. Little did I realize that B-League basketball was actually like training to become a Navy Seal … in Death Valley … with a large three-toed sloth affixed to my back.

Layup lines were easy. I even made a few jumpers in warm-ups, so I got on the court with more confidence than Tony Stark. After about three trips up and down the court (that’s six if you count in one-way trips), I was huffin’ and puffin’ like I just gave birth. When I looked up too quickly, everything got blurry and I felt like I was going to faint. Let me pause and remind you that we’re playing uncompetitive B-League basketball. I’m the first sub out and I can’t even stand on the sidelines. I have to wait until the second half to go back in. I played maybe a third of the entire game and I felt worse than Lance Armstrong felt when he had one of his balls removed.

I got back to my house, started coughing a lot and vomited. Projectile, disgusting, I’m sorry you have to read this part, barf … from 14 minutes of B-League intramural basketball. I never do any exercise, never work out, eat unhealthily, etc. Readers, let me tell you, this will change. This must change. I’m hopping back on the court right after I finish writing this column. I’m changing my diet; hell, maybe I’ll go on a little jog every once and a while. Baby steps are crucial. I hope you do the same. Be healthy and take care of your bodies, because let me tell you … puking after a B-League basketball game is straight up embarrassing.

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Arts & Life

Meiser’s exhibit offers complex ideas

By Courtney Bottazzi

Staff Writer

“Influx.” An interesting name choice for an art exhibition, yet one that carries meaning beyond the obvious.

“The title refers to the influx of information but also at the same time, in flux and constantly changing,” artist Joe Meiser said.

On Feb. 3, Meiser opened his art exhibition in the Samek Art Gallery. The audience, filled with Meiser’s family, friends, colleagues and students, sat in fascination as Meiser described the input of his creative process for the exhibition.

Meiser explained that he tried to relay the type of paradox found in the title of his exhibit throughout his artwork. He was interested in exploring the tensions relevant to the human condition and the coexistence of contradictory concepts, such as beauty and terror, within our modern world.

Meiser also focused on our limitations as human beings. During his lecture, he suggested that one strong example is flawed reasoning.

“Humans may be eluded and enlightened,” Meiser said.

Pushing this idea further, Meiser began to investigate what death means in our era. He questioned the idea of the soul and, with scientific advancements, whether immortality could one day be achieved. The philosophical and scientific research that kick-started Meiser’s creative process was helped by a virtual program called Rhinoceros 3-D. The software allowed him to digitally conceive his ideas and make them a reality.

The extremely compelling artwork produced by Meiser included pieces such as “Stephen Hawking as Elijah, Ascending to Heaven on a Chariot of Fire” and “The Two Deaths of Socrates.” The latter paid homage to Socrates’ concept of dualism, including an air vent through which Socrates’ soul will live on.

Other pieces shifted towards the question of whether non-human animals and artificial intelligence can possibly retain souls. Meiser reflected his answer in pieces called “Hominid and Simian Souls” and “Johnny5.” “Hominid and Simian Souls” were perfectly constructed, yet warped skulls of primal animals. “Johnny5” consisted of photos of a robot going through seemingly mundane human activities, such as brushing its teeth and contemplating its life.

Another project that leaves turbulent waves of contemplation in its wake is the “Robotic Cuckoo Vulture.” This vulture counts down to the end of humanity, or as Meiser joked, to the end of the year 2012. Each of the pieces reminds its viewers of the human condition.

“We strive for permanence even though it’s not possible,” Meiser said.

The depth of Meiser’s creative influences has also reached through to his students.

“He’s very good at getting his students to think creatively. I definitely have been thinking more conceptually and that started with Joe pushing our creative ideas,” Jenna DeLuca ’13 said.

“I’ve only taken a drawing class with Joe and taking a few hours to draw and looking at things in a different way have slowed things down,” Grace Toolan ’13 said.

As viewers walked around the Samek Art Gallery, it was clear Meiser’s art work had this effect on everyone: a chance to slow things down and contemplate our human existence. This captivation was only interrupted by the loud popping of balloons that covered the floor of the gallery, a clear reminder to pay attention to the present moment.

“The awareness of mortality can make each day count,” Meiser said.

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Arts & Life

Off the beat and Path: A Call for Change

By Robert O’Donnell

Columnist

It’s not often that I admit what I write pales in comparison to somebody else’s writing. However, when it comes to Tyler, The Creator’s album, “Goblin,” I am speechless. Fortunately, Sara Quin from the band Tegan and Sara was not, and wrote an open letter on her online blog. Despite the fact that the twin sisters in Tegan and Sara are lesbians, they are not a political band.

“I’ve asked myself a thousand times why this is pushing me over the edge … Maybe it’s because I’m a human being, both a girl and a lesbian. Maybe it’s because my mom has spent her whole adult life working with teenage girls who were victims of sexual assault,” Sara said.

For me, a popular artist spewing hatred should not be ignored, so I felt compelled to write this article. And the worst part, the thing that sealed my decision, was that everyone else was indeed ignoring this spewing hatred. When my friends tell me I don’t understand, or at least need to respect Tyler, The Creator as a creative genius, it makes me furious.

Remember Mel Gibson’s awful anti-Semitic tirade? Remember Michael Richard’s disgusting racist tirade? Yet, when Tyler does the same thing about rape and homosexuals, and puts a beat behind it, everyone dances. The same media that vilified Richards and Gibson, are now giving glowing reviews to Tyler, who is saying the same kind of terrible, unforgivable things as the others.

“When will misogynistic and homophobic ranting and raving result in meaningful repercussions in the entertainment industry?” Sara said.

He might hide behind the excuse that his lyrics are like a movie, but I don’t buy it. Every person should be held accountable for his or her words, no matter how artistically gifted he or she is. I do not care if he claims that he does not believe his lyrics; he is still singing them and turning rape and homophobia into a twisted sort of joke, when they are extremely serious issues in reality. People like Matthew Shepard have been brutally killed due to the homophobia rampant in our culture and even if Tyler is not homophobic himself, he is perpetuating the hatred. If he doesn’t believe it, then he shouldn’t say it.

I’ve been accused of being too uptight and too sensitive about his music, but the fact of the matter is I absolutely despise violence, homophobia and sexual assault. And those are the only things I hear when I listen to his album. How is the music? It is distinct and intriguing, and if the album was instrumental, then I would listen. But I do not and will not ever respect a single thing I hear in this album. I will not go along with a vile message because I am afraid that people will accuse me of not understanding or being too conservative. Sara says that she was reluctant to speak out about it.

“At the very least, I will know that my voice is on record,” Sara said.

And now, mine is too.

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Arts & Life

“State of Wonder” explores scientific and personal progress

By Carolyn Williams

Staff Writer

Ann Patchett’s sixth novel, “State of Wonder,” is a decided departure from her previous body of work. Best known for her beloved “Bel Canto” and her memoir, “Truth and Beauty,” Patchett explores a new world (literally) in “State of Wonder,” delving deep into the Amazon in search of scientific progress and personal growth.

Marina Singh is a middle-aged doctor employed by the Minnesota pharmaceutical firm Vogel, where she does some mild-mannered studies of cholesterol levels until she receives news which permanently alters the course of her life. Her lab partner, Anders, has perished while on an assignment for the company in the Amazon. The firm is forced to send a replacement: Marina.

Mr. Fox, the bland, suit-wearing corporate head of Vogel (and coincidentally Marina’s equally bland, older lover) has chosen Marina as Anders’s replacement because of her relationship to the mission itself. Vogel has been funding the noted scientist Annick Swenson’s extremely secret work for upwards of seven years, and the company has decided that Swenson’s freedom has gone on long enough. Anders was sent to check up on the progress of the development of Swenson’s purported Amazonian fertility drug. As Swenson’s former pupil, Marina is theoretically the most likely to be able to coax some information out of her. However, because the intractable Swenson played a critical role in an accident that derailed Marina’s career, Marina herself is not very confident about her prospects.

Upon arriving in Brazil, Marina promptly realizes that she has lost her luggage, forcing her to literally start from scratch in the city of Manaus. She has to wait weeks before Swenson returns with supplies before she can access the well-hidden tribe of the Lakashi people. In this tribe, due to an extremely rare tree bark, women are able to give birth well past menopause, a fact which has unheard of potential for fertility drugs and is the subject of Swenson’s extensive research. As she becomes more comfortable in her own skin, Marina allows herself to grow and to explore the wild possibilities of the jungle. The trip she never wanted to make becomes the one which finally acquaints her with her true self.

While not the magical, lyrical beauty of “Bel Canto,” “State of Wonder” is still a very worthwhile read. Patchett keeps her readers on their toes between swarms of insects, cannibal tribes, the truly terrific character of Swenson, anacondas, things that go bump in the night and a completely unexpected ending. If perhaps the scope of this adventuresome novel detracts from Patchett’s brilliance as a writer, Marina’s experience does, at times, redeem the book as it reveals the state of wonder she finds in the jungle.

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Arts & Life

Gary Thomas trio ignites passion in Bucknell Hall

By Jen Lassen

Arts & Life Editor

Jazz music extends far beyond easy listening when watching live performers.

On Feb. 1, the Jazz at Bucknell series welcomed the Gary Thomas Trio. The trio, which includes saxophonist Gary Thomas, bassist Blake Meister and drummer Nasar Abadey, filled Bucknell Hall with tremendous sound and captured the audience’s attention for an unforgettable and one-of-a-kind jazz experience.

Phil Haynes, director of the University pep band and BIIE, lecturer in music and a Kushell Jazz Artist-in-Residence, warmly welcomed the trio.

The trio began with a slow, soft melody, making it obvious that something impressive would occur soon after they’d begun. Abadey created a steady rhythm that contrasted Thomas and Meister’s smoothness, yet for some reason this juxtaposition worked in perfect harmony, capturing the audience’s ears.

As the trio continued playing, the melody and rhythm sped up, growing more intense with each second of musical collaboration.

In their performance, there was no sense of individualism; each of the three musicians seemed content with sharing the spotlight with one another; no one musician overpowered the performance. Although there were points during the performance where either Thomas, Abadey or Meister were individually featured, none of them took up too much as a soloist. The collaboration was something the audience could both see and feel.

“I don’t always bring jazz that’s typical or easy listening; I want students to feel like they’ve gone to New York or Berlin to experience it,” Thomas said.

As the audience was watching the trio work their magic, they seemed to take Thomas’ comment to heart and really feel the music rather than just listen to it. Music, although powerful, is only as effective as the people who believe in it. Luckily, the Gary Thomas Trio was treated to a room full of believers and appreciators of the art of song.

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Arts & Life

Rooke Chapel Ringers continue as Univ. hallmark

By Jen Lassen

Arts & Life Editor

Shiny brass bells have long been a traditional symbol of the University, right up there with bison, the Bertrand Library clock tower and Rooke Chapel itself.

The Chapel bells symbolize the talented, dedicated and well-known Rooke Chapel Ringers handbell choir that has been a distinguished and wonderful group the University has the pleasure of calling its own.

The group consists of 16 talented current and former University students all fully committed to one of our finest traditions.

“We trust each other to do well, and that trust pulls through each time we play a piece,” Maria Thomas ’12 said.

Organized in 1983 under the direction of Dr. William A. Payn, director of choral studies, the group has performed at countless services and events. The Rooke Chapel Ringers regularly perform at the Protestant worship services on campus, but their big event each year is the traditional Christmas Candlelight Service in Rooke Chapel each December. This program, which has been taped and repeatedly televised by PBS, has been nominated for two Emmys, giving the group some serious bragging rights. The Ringers have earned a dignified spot in the University’s heritage, and for good reason.

“Their performances are always beautifully executed with lots of ‘connection’ with the audience. The PBS presentations, viewed throughout the country, are extremely professional … produced and directed by a very creative team. The ringer’s project the joy of ringing in their faces and their musical ability is unmatched by other college or university handbell ensembles. Audiences are always immediately on their feet at the end of performances,” Payn said.

“I think it’s because handbell ringing is usually kept to churches and isn’t widely publicized that seeing a very good handbell group such as the Rooke Chapel Ringers surprises people and makes them remember us,” Thomas said.

Other performances by the Ringers include a holiday tour through the seniors’ hometowns, a spring concert to be held on Sat. April 28 and a showing at this year’s Baccalaureate on Sat. May 19. The group has also traveled far and wide–-from New York City to Switzerland and Austria–-to perform for various audiences.

“I can’t even begin to express what a privilege it is for me to travel with these 16 young students. They represent Bucknell so very well. Most are not music majors, but represent most of the fields of study at Bucknell. It is indeed impressive and it is very obvious to the audience that these students are extremely passionate about their music-making as well as their studies,” Payn said.

Just like a well-balanced lifestyle is characteristic of University students, the Rooke Chapel Ringers will forever be a shining characteristic of the University’s past, present and future for many years to come.

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Arts & Life

Tiempo Libre creates foreign experience for audience

By Jen Lassen

Arts & Life Editor

Sure, we live in Central Pennsylvania, but it only takes a bit of believing and a whole lot of music to transport us to Cuba.

This is exactly what happened on Friday, Feb. 3 when the three-time Grammy nominated, all-Cuban timba band Tiempo Libre performed at the University. The Weis Center for the Performing Arts was transformed from Lewisburg’s best concert hall to an Afro-Cuban celebration where audience members could not help but join in on the fun.

Right from the start, pianist and musical director of the group Jorge Gomez said “this isn’t going to be a regular concert; it’s going to be a Cuban party!”

And boy, was he right. The group, comprised of Gomez, Joaquin “El Kid” Diaz (lead vocals), Tebelio “Tony” Fonte (bass), Luis Beltran Castillo (saxophone and flute), Leandro Gonzales (congas), Raúl Rodríguez (trumpet) and Armando “Pututi” Arce (drums), confidently began performing with such intensity and flavor that audience members had no choice but to tap their feet, snap their fingers and jump out of their seats to dance along to the beat. University students danced down the aisles shaking their hips to the melodies, while older couples swayed to the music together in the balcony and audience members hopped out of their seats to bust out moves of their own, creating a uniting cultural experience for all.

It quickly became apparent how well the group collaborated together to form their own unique, high-voltage, Afro-Cuban sound. The group started their performance with an upbeat instrumental piece; then Diaz joined in and began singing beautiful and impassioned Spanish lyrics that captured the audience’s attention. Although the majority of the audience probably had no idea what was being said, Diaz’s soul, passion and dedication to his vocals were mesmerizing.

The group’s Cuban roots certainly were showcased on stage; all members of the band–including the drummer–were dancing in classic Cuban style and singing in Spanish throughout the entire show.

“[They] listened to Cuban music and grew up with the culture,” Gomez said.

Above all, Tiempo Libre exuded pure joy while performing. Their enthusiasm for their music was infectious: shortly after they began playing their instruments the audience seemed to get up, one by one, to participate in the “Cuban party” created by Tiempo Libre.

“The upbeat rhythms and passionate vocals really reflected the energy and dynamism of Tiempo Libre. Their entire performance was inspiring–I loved every minute of it!” Emily Heller ’15 said.

Even though our “bubble” is small and fairly isolated from foreign places like Cuba, Tiempo Libre’s performance had the power to take us there within minutes. The artists seemed to invoke “mucha felicidad” (much happiness) into the lives of the listeners,transformed into Cuban dancers. Those who attended would agree that the experience was a positive “culture shock” we all need once in a while.

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Arts & Life Sleeping Around

Sleeping Around: V-Day in Every Way

Stacey Lace

Columnist

For Valentine’s Day, my boyfriend from high school used to send me a dozen flowers for each year we’d been dating. By our last V-Day together, I managed to get 36 gorgeous red roses out of him.

I’m not trying to sound spoiled (although I clearly am), but even I think that might be going a little overboard. I’m just not sure that Feb. 14, and Feb. 14 alone, is the only day in a year that chicks should whip out the see-through red lace lingerie or guys should plan romantic dates with chocolate and flowers.

I know that the whole origin of V-Day was for St. Valentine, the martyr. That’s great and everything, but now it feels like an excuse to find somebody to fool around with for a couple weeks in the middle of the winter.

For someone lucky enough to have a date to a party tonight, I realize I sound pretty cynical of a holiday all about love. I just don’t know why we have to save up all our romanticism and passion for one night.

It’s not as if V-Day is even the sexiest day of the year. Seriously, think about it. There’s New Year’s, when you can ring in a new sex partner. July has Independence Day, where fireworks can get anyone hot. St. Patty’s day is a great time to “Kiss me, I’m Irish.” My personal favorite sexy holiday is Columbus Day, you know, so you can discover a “new world.” To each his own, I guess.

Regardless of being a poorly-placed holiday seemingly meant for bundling up and not stripping down, V-Day is just so purposeless.

I’d like to think that we could all just tone down V-Day so it can be v-day instead, but I realize that a lot of people won’t stand for that. Cutting back doesn’t have to be a big deal. A couple could easily skip the big night out for a cozy night in together and save the fine wining and dining for a night in April when we don’t have to wear parkas.

Also, I live in a dorm room; where am I supposed to put three dozen roses? I’m also a plant killer. Honestly, I look at plants and they die. The cost-to-benefit analysis of V-Day roses just doesn’t prove to be worth it.

Give me a simple box of chocolates and I promise I won’t be just a V-Day fling. I’ll stick around until Columbus Day for a little late-night lovin’.