Month: November 2012

El McCabe

Writer

Hurricane Sandy was more than just a storm: it was a life-altering and destructive force that forever changed the lives of millions up and down the East Coast. Being a native New Yorker, this last week has been painful hearing off-hand the effects Sandy had on my hometown and people in my community. Personally, my family went without power for a week, but was safe from most of the wrath of the hurricane. Not everyone proved to be as lucky. New York and other states on the eastern seaboard have been referred to as a “war zone” in the aftermath of the hurricane. Over 10 days later, bodies are still being found–a fact that the media is doing a terrible job of reporting. Thousands of families are homeless and lost everything they had. After hearing all these horrifying stories, the obvious question appeared in my mind: how did the country let conditions get this bad?

To answer this, it is important to note the public attitude toward the storm prior to the disaster. The hurricane started off as an exciting prospect that almost guaranteed no school in most states including Pennsylvania. A few days before the storm hit, Hurricane Sandy was the subject of hundreds of exuberant Facebook statuses, memes and countless “SpongeBob”/“Grease” references. However, once the severity of the storm was realized, all the jokes and school closings were no longer funny. The mild effects of Hurricane Irene last year left the public feeling arrogant that this storm was “over-hyped” yet again, and many Americans failed to heed warnings to evacuate their homes. These individuals are paying for their choices now and truly have nothing but the clothes on their backs. Relief efforts are finally starting to be taken in damaged communities, but there is a long way to go before balance can be restored.

As college students, we are inherently isolated from the rest of the world without our parents informing us or overhearing the news, so it is likely most of you are unaware of the state of parts of the country outside of the “Bucknell Bubble.” The east coast needs help, and it needs it fast. Donations are strongly encouraged, as is spreading the word about the nightmare some Americans continue to face. Thousands of people lost everything they owned, so even donating basic supplies such as toiletries, old clothes and even small cans of food can seriously make a huge difference. I know that as soon as Thanksgiving Break hits, I will be doing my part in helping the recovery process. If you are looking for ways to get involved, just try reaching out to relief organizations. Small efforts are all it takes to make a world of difference, and educating yourself on happenings outside of campus is the first step in helping our nation restore the damage done by Hurricane Sandy.

Justin Marinelli

Senior Writer

An important part of college is not just learning to adjust and make friends, but also learning to make the right friends. One of the keys to not only success but to having an awesome life in general is having a varied friend set. In my experience, here are some of the friends that are either essential or incredibly important.

First off, you need a friend that is really comfortable talking with people, especially to members of whatever sex you may be attracted to. Having one of those fearless friends who can just walk up and strike up a conversation with almost anyone is an utter boon to your social circle, provided that you either actively join them or passively let yourself get dragged along for the ride. You never know who you might just meet.

Second, it’s also incredibly helpful to have a friend who is always able to dish out incredibly wise advice. Even the brightest and most self-sufficient person will eventually run into situations that are difficult to handle alone. It’s those times that you need a friend who can always figure out the best course of action. Life always has a few bumps in the road and having someone who knows how to ride it makes it a lot easier.

In a similar vein, another essential friend to have is the one that you can tell anything to.  Keeping things in and shouldering your burdens yourself isn’t impossible and there are some things that need to be kept secret, but being able to get things off your chest every once in a while is immensely cathartic. Additionally, knowing that you’ve got someone who will be a source of support no matter what is a fantastic confidence booster when facing just about anything.

A lot of the time we end up spewing a river of statements that can be … inaccurate.  Whether it’s an off-color joke, an argument not rooted in fact or just acting like an idiot in general, oftentimes we tend not to realize when we’re not living up to our intelligence.  Having a friend around who will call us out on these things is way more important than we tend to realize. I would argue that it’s a necessity.

Finally, I would say it’s incredibly important to have a friend with a nose to the ground when it comes to things going on around campus. Oftentimes, you hear about really cool events that don’t get enough publicity or unique opportunities that not too many people know about. You can also stay abreast of who’s hooking up with who, and other things like that. A friend with a finger on the pulse is a worthwhile friend to have.

Life is a lot more fun when you know a bunch of great people, and I’ve found that these are the people who are great to know. This is nowhere near an exhaustive list of people worth knowing (because frankly, almost everyone is worth getting to know on some level). If you ever find yourself in need of a new friend or two, try to find someone with one of these strengths. It’ll pay off handsomely for you in no time.

Ben Kaufman

Presentation Director

The first word that comes to my mind when I think of hallcest is “ew.” But first, hallcest should probably be defined. In my opinion, hallcest is the act of either hooking up or dating somebody on your residence hall. Although there are rare times that it works out to date someone on your hall, from what I have seen, it usually only ends badly. Here is an example as to why I think that.

I have a friend–we’ll call him Joe–at Binghamton University in Upstate New York. He and his girlfriend met because they lived on the same hall their first year. The story sounds really cute up until the point when they decided to live on the same hall sophomore year as well and broke up at one point. Joe began planning his normal routine around the fact that his girlfriend lived on his hall. For example, he would always get coffee from his girlfriend’s room and then go to class, as well as form other plans with her when he would return from class. However, when they were broken up, that obviously wouldn’t happen, and he therefore had to find a new routine.

I actually told my girlfriend that if we went to the same school, I would not want to live on the same hall as her. It always seems to turn out that if you are in a relationship with someone on your hall, you literally have no time to yourself. It is almost like living with your girlfriend or boyfriend, because whenever you go back to your hall your girlfriend or boyfriend will be there too.

However, I will not completely bash hallcest because sometimes it does work. For example, there is a guy in my fraternity who started dating a girl from his first-year hall, and they are still together despite having always lived in very close proximity. I will acknowledge that hallcest is something that can be successful, but I just don’t think it is something I could do.

On this campus, I feel like hallcest mostly ends in awkward situations. It most likely starts as a hookup at a party, which then progresses to an awkward morning realization that you hooked up with somebody on your hall and then you go from there. And if it’s your first-year hall, you don’t even know the person that well and then you start hooking up or dating him or her.

Hallcest is a tricky situation. I think if it is managed well, then it could probably work. Although it can work, it is not an endeavor I would personally want to go through. Knowing the nature of hallcest, I feel like it would only end in awkwardness and not actually be something practical. If you are currently dating someone on your hall and it is going well, then good for you. I just personally don’t think that I–and I probably speak for many others–would be able to do it and have it end well.

Emily Guillen
Editor-in-Chief

As a college female who participated in hallcest during my first year, I can honestly say that it was not one of my better ideas. It was convenient to have my boyfriend close by, not only so I could be around him most of the time, but also so I could keep an eye on him. However, convenience does not form the basis of a solid relationship.

Looking back, the relationship was mostly based on accessibility and fleeting lust. We didn’t have a lot in common, leaving us with little to talk about. Our personalities didn’t really click and we weren’t a good match, but since we lived on the same hall, we continued to date.

As the year went on, we both started losing interest in each other and we were fighting all the time. The dilemma was that I knew that if we broke up, it would be really awkward to live on the same hall and be forced to see each other all the time. The arguments culminated in a really bad breakup that happened to coincide with my moving to another hall (something that resulted from many different issues building up all year). I realized afterward that I felt relieved that I wouldn’t have to see him all the time, and I wouldn’t have to pretend to still be invested in a relationship that was obviously over. My initial first-year hall had about four hallcest relationships, but not a single one has lasted since then. My second first-year hall had one couple that is still together after one of them studied abroad, so it is clearly possible to make things work when there is a real connection, not just a convenient living situation.

Fast forward three years and now I’m living on the same hall as the guy I dated sophomore year. Not only is it awkward because we didn’t maintain a friendship after the breakup, but it’s also awkward anytime my current boyfriend comes over and happens to run into him or when my roommates get caught in a conversation with him.

I think it’s natural as a first-year to come to school, meet new people and find someone on your hall attractive. I think we’re always attracted to the people we spend the most time with, and during your first year, they are the people living in your residence hall. At the same time, I wish I’d thought further ahead about my four years at the University and made better long-term decisions. I’m not saying I shouldn’t have dated someone that I wanted to, but maybe I shouldn’t have let the relationship become so dependent on our living situation and let it continue when it was clear that it wasn’t right.

Overall, I think hallcest doesn’t work out and is more trouble than it’s worth about 98 percent of the time, but hey, that two percent that does work out can be worth the risk.